In this week’s episode, we’ll learn that even the national embarrassments are bigger in Texas, we find that pastors are mathematically sad and alone, and we’ll shop a new spot for our secret communism portal.
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To buy our book, click here: 2023-06-29 02:18:34 +0000 UTC View Post
Probably the most adorable visual aid to ever appear in one of our scripts this week, so it's worth reading along.
2023-06-22 02:46:39 +0000 UTC View PostIn this week’s episode, a taco hut sees if they can make a LITTLE spanish inquisition work, Catholics grapple with the blood of Christ being a GMO, and Ray Comfort will let us know if black lives really matter.
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To see us live in Detroit, click here: 2023-06-22 02:44:50 +0000 UTC View Post
Because once again, Heath included a picture.
2023-06-15 01:57:32 +0000 UTC View PostIn this week’s episode, we’ll speak ill of the dead; the Los Angeles Dodgers celebrate "medium tepid pride month" so as not to persecute Christianity; and we’ll talk to the guys from Data Over Dogma, because any time you put something over dogma, you’re on the right track.
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Read along! Do the voices! Use puppets!
2023-06-08 02:16:55 +0000 UTC View PostThis week's patron bonus material includes 3+ minutes of extra headlines stuff, an extended interview, Eli buying stocks, Heath going to the dentist, and an in depth discussion of the best Ninja Turtle. There's also several minutes after the ads at the end, because one of our off script discussio...
2023-06-08 02:15:29 +0000 UTC View Post
This week, you get almost half again as much show AND you get a horrifying picture of Kandiss Taylor's lifeless eyes stuffed in the script somewhere.
2023-06-01 02:46:41 +0000 UTC View PostIn this week’s episode, Christian Karens miss their target, God performs the miracle of defying the "use by" freshness label, and Georgia politics will somehow get even dumber.
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To buy our book, click there: 2023-06-01 02:30:17 +0000 UTC View Post
In this week’s episode, the omnipotent creator of the universe loses quite a few fans, we learn from Pastors For Trump that the white power of Christ compels us, and we’ll thaw out Don Ford (voice of Fantasy and Adventure) once again.
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To buy our book, click there: 2023-05-25 03:08:07 +0000 UTC View Post
Featuring music from Anna Bosnick AND a bonus headline only for patrons.
2023-05-18 02:31:25 +0000 UTC View PostFeaturing japes AND music from Anna Bosnick! Plus a bonus headline just for patrons.
2023-05-18 01:56:21 +0000 UTC View Post
Including the script for the patron-only story that most of the listeners don't even know about. Because we love you more.
2023-05-11 03:49:55 +0000 UTC View PostIn this week’s episode, Iran will officially mark themselves as a spoiler for america’s future, King Charles III has a farcical LAND-BASED ceremony to avoid looking silly, and we’ll learn what Dennis Prager has instead of a conscience.
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To buy our book, click there: 2023-05-11 03:48:29 +0000 UTC View Post
Hello Patrons,
It’s that time of year again - MATREON - where we promote ourselves for a month in hopes that you will continue to support the show(s) with your dollars so we can give away even more free episodes to the masses. We love you the best and we know you want to love us eve...
2023-05-10 14:54:27 +0000 UTC View Post
Can Heath mention Stew Peters without inserting a picture of him into the script? Only $2 and up patrons can know for sure...
2023-05-04 03:17:05 +0000 UTC View PostIn this week’s episode, Satan comes for Beantown, we offer Tucker Carlson a very lucrative unpaid internship...working for exposure, and bullshit will rain down from the heavens.
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To buy our book, click there: 2023-05-04 03:16:03 +0000 UTC View Post
This week's script is great for spoken word karaoke!
2023-04-27 03:46:56 +0000 UTC View PostIn this week’s episode, Christianity puts the “mass” in mass grave, we learn that Clarence Thomas is friends with a nazi...other than his wife...another one, and Don Ford will learn that he memorized that Pulp Fiction monologue for nothing.
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Come see us live in Detroit on Jul...
2023-04-27 03:36:09 +0000 UTC View Post
Heath has once again inserted a visual aid into the script, so only our very best patrons get the full episode experience.
2023-04-20 03:32:02 +0000 UTC View PostIn this week’s episode, Tennessee silences teachers in the name of unity, Mifepristone might become illegal nationwide thanks to one simple trick from 1873, and David Icke will tell us how racist he isn’t. Racistly.
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Come see us live in Detroit on January 22nd: 2023-04-20 03:30:18 +0000 UTC View Post
Hi Patrons!
It’s THAT time again. Time to announce the next God Awful Movies live show and we’re giving you first crack at tickets because we like you BEST.
Date: Saturday, July 22, 2023 from 7-9pm
Location: Detroit
Venue: Garden Theater
Tickets $45 to $395
This week's misspellings are truly wonderful if you sift all the way through.
2023-04-13 03:02:09 +0000 UTC View PostIn this week’s episode, Christians get in a fight with yet another board game, Kid Rock demonstrates his nuanced palate by switching from Bud to Coors, and we’ll see if Noah can still do top ten convention memories when the con is in a weed legal state.
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To buy our book, click ...
2023-04-13 02:58:10 +0000 UTC View PostThis week, see the visual aids Heath can't help but drop in to the notes here and there...
2023-04-06 02:44:05 +0000 UTC View PostThis week, we load you down with a ton of bonus stuff, including a Patron-only headline from Marsh, and more than 7 extra minutes of God Awful Mini!
2023-04-06 02:42:17 +0000 UTC View PostIn this week’s episode, book banning bites the butts of the city of Brigham, God visits a town in Connecticut to serve unlimited breadsticks made of his son, and Don Ford visits a podcast in Jersey, Michigan, and Georgia and doesn’t bring any breadsticks at all.
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To make a per ...
2023-03-30 02:58:14 +0000 UTC View Post
Guess who's doing rectal ozone therapy?
2023-03-23 05:26:59 +0000 UTC View PostFeaturing THE Michael Marshall and a bonus headline for all you generous Patreon people.
2023-03-23 04:56:42 +0000 UTC View PostHey Patrons,
For a segment on the upcoming Scathing Atheist, we’re doing a bit of an AMA thing with Marsh. We’re looking for questions from the fans. Maybe things about QED, his work as a professional skeptic, or something from his Be Reasonable podcast. Stuff like that.
Hurry and...
2023-03-20 20:37:37 +0000 UTC View Post