A Massive Pain In The Ass - 3/6 [Little Sh*t Part 10]

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Katsuki kept his plush All Might in hand as he trudged down the stairs, hood hanging over his face a little as he tried to rub his sleepy eyes. No matter how much he’d tried, he hadn’t been able to fall asleep – which made sense, since big boys didn’t take naps, but he was pretty exhausted. Izuku, on the other hand, was all bright-eyed and rearing to go, babbling up a storm as he waved his matching plushie in the air, weaving some silly hero story to Shouto, who nodded along despite having no clue what he was saying.

Shouto had shown up to wake them for dinner, surprised to find Katsuki still just lying there, tossing and turning and occasionally stopping to give Izuku a hug to keep him calm while he slept. Izuku had woken up quickly, when Shouto greeted him, and the word “dinner” apparently sparked his interest enough to make him start flailing and yelling in excitement. It had been way too loud, right by Katsuki’s ears, and he’d sat up in a hurry, cringing until Shouto awkwardly plucked the noisy thing from his bed and took his attention elsewhere.

When they made it to the bottom of the stairs, Katsuki slumped into a dining room chair, frustrated all over again at how tall the stupid table was. The two little girls were already there, chattering to each other happily, perched on thick pillows that propped them up high enough to reach the table easier. No one had thought to offer Katsuki some pillows though, and he didn’t want to ask, so instead he just pouted in his chair while all their stupid classmates fawned over Izuku and the All Might he kept waving at them.

Kirishima dragged the baby chair over to sit beside him, setting Izuku inside. It had a little seatbelt in it, which Kirishima fastened despite Izuku’s unimpressed gurgles, and Katsuki knew he’d made a good decision – Izuku would have been out of that chair the moment he spotted something shiny, even if he couldn’t sit up by himself.

“Here you go,” Shouto said quietly, setting a bowl of rice and a spoon in front of Katsuki. “You sure you don’t want anything else?”

“M’sure.”

“Alright, you’re welcome then.”

Katsuki huffed, but he grumbled a little “thanks” as Shouto stepped away, and from the flash of a smirk on Shouto’s face, he knew he’d heard.

He pulled his bowl to the edge of the table, taking a big spoonful to shove in his mouth, but paused when he saw Shouto return with another bowl, setting it in front of Izuku on his little tray. Izuku beamed and squeaked when he saw it, immediately jamming his hand into what Katsuki hoped was not fresh-off-the-stove potatoes, and excitedly threw his handful straight onto Katsuki’s new shirt.

“Oh! No! Mido- Uh, Izuku! No throwing!”

Kirishima hurried to move the bowl away, to stop him from doing it again, and Izuku’s unimpressed shriek filled the entire building when it moved out of his reach.

“Stop it!” Katsuki growled him, eyebrows knitting together. “Stop yelling! And don’t throw food! I’m telling your mom!”

Izuku seemed stunned for a moment, then puffed out his little cheeks, turning to Katsuki before he let out an ear-splitting “baaaaahhhhh!”

“Don’t yell at me!” Katsuki yelled right back. “You got mashtatoes on me!”

“Wuuuuuuuuuu!”

“Shut up!”

“Bakugou, stop, he’s only a baby, he doesn’t understand,” Kirishima said gently, offering Izuku a spoonful of potato in the hope of placating him.

“My name is Kacchan!”

He pushed his rice away, hopping up from his chair to storm away, only stopping when the lumps of potato dribbled down his shirt, one spot falling onto his All Might plushie.

“You got him dirty!” Katsuki yelled, slapping the leg of the plastic chair. “Stupid baby!”

“Maaaa!”

“Are we interrupting?”

Katsuki turned around with a scowl, finding the old-man teacher from earlier standing in the doorway, but with a girl only a little bigger than himself standing at his side. She had a pile of books in her arms, a bag of something strung over her arm, and an expression on her face that just seemed to look right through him, like she could see all the gooey bits inside his body.

“Sorry, Sensei!” Kirishima said sheepishly. “We just sat down to dinner, but it... hasn’t gone quite to plan, as you can see.”

“I doubt it ever does. Eri just wanted to come see Baby Midoriya, but I’ll give you a hand while we’re here. You should have told me you needed help.”

“We didn’t! I mean, maybe we do now, but we didn’t know we did!”

Katsuki huffed when the teacher led the girl past him, her eyes darting back to him for a moment – they were almost the same colour as his own.

“Hello,” she said quietly, surprising the teacher who quickly looked back at them. “I’m Eri.”

“M’Kacchan,” he mumbled – it wasn’t her fault the others were being jerks, after all.

“It’s nice to meet you, Kacchan!” she smiled softly. “I brought some books, do you like reading?”

Katsuki nodded, and Eri’s smile stretched wider.

“Do you wanna change your shirt?” she asked. “Then I can show you all my books.”

“Okay.”

“I can clean your All Might, if you want?”

He hesitated, but when she set down the books and held her hands out, he conceded. She took him gently, with such a delicate touch that Katsuki trusted her right away – she would take care of his All Might properly, not like the big people would.

“M’gonna change,” he grumbled, already heading for the elevator they’d used earlier.

“I’ll be here!”

He reached up to push the four button, watching the big doors slide closed between him and the noisy group, and breathed a heavy sigh as it began to carry him up. Despite remembering the floor, it took him two tries to find the right door – why did all the stupid doors look the same? – but finally he found his neat little stack of clothes, sitting beside the bed that both tempted and taunted him at the same time. The potatoes on his shirt made him scowl all over again, balling it up and tossing it into a corner. Kirishima could deal with it later, if he was so determined to babysit or whatever.

He was sorely tempted to just stay in the bedroom all night, maybe dig through older-him’s stuff to get a glimpse of the future, but his stomach was growling, and he knew there was still a big bowl of rice waiting for him downstairs. So he put on a clean shirt and his big boy face, squared his shoulders, and sneaked down the stairs to where the others were waiting.

Chubby-cheeks was stuffing handfuls of food in her mouth like there was no tomorrow, collecting bites of everything on the table – from meat to vegetables to rice and everything in between. She even ate a handful of the mashtatoes, much to Izuku’s dismay – Katsuki could see the pout on his face from a mile away. Not that his tiny baby stomach could have fitted the whole pot in, but apparently he was determined to try. Said baby was quickly distracted, though, when the weird old man offered him a spoonful of his own potatoes, his mouth opening wide to let it in.

Even the quiet girl with the long hair didn’t notice him arrive, and she had seemed to notice everything, before that. She was too busy picking around her plate, nudging things with her spoon, too busy examining everything to have even taken a single bite.

In fact, the only one who noticed him was the girl with his eyes – Eri. She smiled at him the moment he stepped through the door, and he just blinked at her, unsure how to respond to that. People didn’t smile at Katsuki, not like that – in a way that seemed like they were actually happy to see him.

“All better!” she told him, holding out the plushie. He was a little damp on the front, but sure enough, every trace of potato and cheese was gone.

“Thanks,” he mumbled, accepting it from her hands. “I, um...”

“It’s okay,” she said knowingly. “I’m glad I could help! I’m gonna read a story, you wanna read with me?”

“Okay.”

His stomach growled, and Eri smiled again, nodding toward the little coffee table in the dorm living area.

“I can read out loud while you eat.”

“Okay,” he said again, squeezing his plushie a little. “I’ll get my food.”

“Okay!”

He tiptoed back to the table, sliding his bowl and spoon off the edge as carefully as possible, and ignoring the little eyebrow raise that came his way from Kirishima. He hurried back to the living room area, sitting down beside Eri, and she smiled again as she held up two books.

“Which one do you think?” she asked. “This one has cool animals, but this one has magic!”

“Does it have sharks?”

“I don’t think so, but it has lions!”

Katsuki contemplated for a moment, but nodded, pointing at the animal book.

“I like lions,” he said. “Lion story.”

“I like lions too!”

She tucked a blanket over his lap and leaned back against the sofa, making sure Katsuki still had enough room to see the pictures as she began to read.

He was glad she did, because the pictures turned out to be super cool – full of big animals with sharp teeth, long claws, even horns like the one Eri had on her head! He was a little jealous, he wished he had horns.

“Do you know what my quirk is when I’m big?” he asked, when the book came to an end. “I don’t know yet, but they said I’m big normally.”

“I do!” she nodded firmly. “Do you wanna know?”

He screwed up his face, considering it, and finally shook his head.

“I wanna be surprised. But it’s a cool one, right?”

“Very cool,” she assured him. “Everyone thinks so, not just me and you!”

“Good. I knew it would be!”

“Do you want to read another story together?” she offered. “You still have rice.”

“Yeah. Magic story.”

“Okay! Magic time!”

By the time Katsuki had eaten his fill, Eri had read him three different stories from the pile of books, and she slid him the rest of the pile when they finished. He blinked at her, not sure what to say, and she just smiled at him sweetly.

“You can keep these to read when I’m gone!” she explained. “They’re my old ones that I’ve read lots and lots, so it’s your turn now!”

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome!”

When Izuku was finished eating his potatoes, cleaned up, and had a fresh diaper on, the old man suggested it was time to start heading home, and Eri smiled at him one more time as she stood up, nodding her agreement.

“Time for my dinner too, and sleep!” she explained. “It was nice to see you, Kacchan!”

“Yeah,” he nodded. “Um, you too.”

“When you’re big again, you can read me a cool story, okay?”

“I will, I promise.”

“I’ll see you then!”

She said a quick goodbye to Izuku, too, squeezing him in a hug and kissing his fluffy hair, then waved goodbye to them both as she left. Katsuki was strangely sad to see her go, but Izuku was immediately waving at him and whining, demanding that one of the big people let him down to paw at Kacchan needily. Katsuki allowed it this time, letting Izuku make happy noises as he patted at Katsuki’s leg excitedly, and even allowed him one little hug when he puffed his cheeks out and insisted. Katsuki still hadn’t forgiven him for throwing mashtatoes at him, but he knew Izuku was still only little, and he probably didn’t mean to make Katsuki mad.

Soon there were more big people crowding into the room, cooing over the girls being all tiny and cute, and giggling at Izuku’s fat little body, until one of them started shooting stuff from his arms like a spider’s butt, stringing long strips across the room with a big dopey grin on his face. Chubby-cheeks eagerly sat herself on it, and Katsuki watched as she began to swing, another guy pushing from behind to swing her higher. It was actually kind of cool, he hated to admit, but honestly the only thing Katsuki wanted to do was sleep.

In the end, the girls seemed to feel the same way – Chubby-cheeks quickly began to drift off on her swing, rocked to sleep without even trying, and when Mina began to carry her up the stairs, the girl with long hair followed at her heels. The last thing Katsuki heard from them was a quiet voice asking what the chef was making for breakfast in the morning, which made no sense to Katsuki, but that the big people all chuckled over. Some big guy Katsuki didn’t think had spoken to yet promised to make something “fancy looking” so that she would “eat properly”, and they all seemed satisfied with that answer, so he supposed he didn’t really need to understand, anyway.

“Are you ready for bed, Kacchan?” Kirishima asked gently, when a big yawn burst out of Katsuki’s mouth.

“No!”

“No?” Kirishima blinked at him. “Are you sure? You’re not tired?”

“Don’t wanna,” Katsuki huffed, hugging his All Might tightly. “No sleep.”

“Did you get much sleep earlier? When Izuku had his nap?”

Katsuki didn’t answer, puffing his cheeks out stubbornly, and Shouto shook his head.

“He was still awake when I went up,” the traitor informed everyone. “Is everything okay, Ba- Um, Kacchan?”

“I’m fine.”

“What if I read you a bedtime story?” Kirishima offered. “We could go up to your room and get comfy in bed and read a book together?”

“I don’t want your stupid stories!” Katsuki yelled, his eyes getting teary no matter how much he tried to blink them away. “No bed!”

Shouto just stared at him for a moment, considering him, before he finally turned to look at Kirishima again.

“Do you think we should call his parents for advice?” he asked. “I know Aizawa-sensei said they can’t visit yet, but they could probably offer some suggestions, right?”

Katsuki couldn’t help but perk up slightly at the words, sitting up a tiny bit straighter, but Stupid Shouto’s eyes caught it immediately. He nodded before Katsuki could say anything, gesturing toward the hallway, and looked Katsuki dead in the eye despite addressing his words to Kirishima.

“Why don’t you get him and Izuku tucked into bed, and we can call his dad to see what he says?”

Katsuki didn’t object, this time, and in a heartbeat he found himself lying on a little futon, Izuku already dribbling and snoozing at his side, his big-self’s phone ringing in Shouto’s hand.

“Hello, Mister Bakugou,” Shouto greeted him, when the line connected. “I assume Aizawa-sensei has contacted you?”

“Hello, Shouto! He has! Is everything okay?”

“We’re all fine,” Shouto assured him. “I have Kacchan here, he’s been... having a little trouble getting to sleep. We thought you might have some advice.”

He turned the screen around, and Katsuki felt himself welling up again when he saw his dad’s face on it. He looked a little different than Katsuki remembered, but he still had the same warm eyes behind his glasses, and the same soft smile, slightly obscured by his fuzzy moustache. Katsuki was gonna grow one too, one day – they seemed warm, and he liked warm things.

“Hey there, Kacchan,” Masaru said softly. “I miss you, it’s been a while.”

Katsuki reached for the phone, and Shouto obeyed, letting him nestle it carefully between his too-small hands. He brought it closer to his face, close enough to see the hint of tears in his dad’s eyes, to take in every little detail of his favourite person – well, other than All Might – looking out at him from the little glass rectangle.

“Hi Dad,” he answered quietly.

“Have you had a fun day? It must be weird, huh?”

“Really weird,” he nodded. “I got to choose cool clothes, see my All Might pyjamas?”

“I do see!” Masaru smiled. “They look super cool, and nice and warm!”

“Uh-huh. They’re soft.”

“I’m glad, that should help you get a good sleep tonight. I’m sorry I can’t be there with you right now. I would be if I could, I tried my hardest, but they said not tonight.”

“S’okay, I’m a big boy.”

“I know you are. My big, brave, hero son. I bet you’re taking good care of little Izuku too.”

“Uh-huh!” He rolled over a little, pointing the screen at the sleepy baby. “He’s so squishy. Why are babies so lumpy?”

“You know, that’s a very good question. Maybe because they fall over a lot when they’re learning to sit up and crawl and walk? Being squishy might protect them from hurting themselves.”

“Oh. So being squishy is clever?”

“Exactly.”

“Hmm. I guess he’s not as dumb as I thought.”

“I’m sure he’ll be glad to hear it.”

Katsuki snuggled down deeper in his bed, pulling the blankets up to his shoulders, only his hands and face peeking out to keep looking at his phone.

“Can you tell me a story?” he requested.

“A bedtime story?” Masaru asked knowingly. “Of course, don’t I always?”

“Uh-huh.”

“Are you nice and comfy?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay, let me think of a good one.”

Shouto smiled at them, waving his goodbye at the pair as he headed toward the door, and Katsuki only spared him a quick glance when the door clicked open.

“Call out if you need anything,” he reminded the kid. “Kirishima will be up a little later.”

“Mm-hm.”

Masaru was already starting his story by the time Shouto closed the door behind him, shaking his head a little fondly. For someone who was so fiercely independent at every age, he was surprisingly sweet when it came to his father. It was no wonder Katsuki had defended him so adamantly when Endeavour The Asshole had shown up – he knew what it meant to have a proper dad.

When Kirishima sneaked his way into the room, much later in the night, he found two boys sleeping soundly on their tiny futon, matching All Might plushies tucked into their arms. In addition, though, a darkened phone screen lay in Katsuki’s grip, hugged tight to his chest. He slid it carefully out of the tiny hands, plugging it into the charger that lay beside Katsuki’s bed, and smiled to himself faintly when a battery-charging icon lit up the screen.

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