DoujinStars
DerekVasconi
DerekVasconi

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Another relationship bomb dropped in my life tonight, plus answering a Patreon question, talking about suffering and God, upcoming idol shows, and more more more

LINK:   https://52.gigafile.nu/0622-ec9ad14b33558b257fa93b1635c5ddcdf

Comments

Thank you so much for your kind words. I feel what they are doing is also pretty shitty, but I mean when you live in a country like Japan, maybe to Japanese people, this kind of reaction by them makes sense. But to everybody else in the entire world, it's obvious this is just behavior that stems from a culture here in Japan that Japanese people are taught from early on in their lives... that is.... to run from problems rather than deal with them. To keep all the problems inside of your heart and then one day explode. And worst of all, to not accept when situations are gray rather than black and white. And that mistakes happen, and certainly also misunderstandings, and why not be the bigger and better and more adult like person and forgive and move on? Why now, of all mistakes I've made, do these people draw a line in their sand and say they can't work with me? It makes literally zero sense to me. I made a mistake... GET OVER IT. And if it was any of them... I would totally forgive them and just forget about it and move on. And most importantly, I did NOT lie about the situation, and why my explanation about what happened is not being accepted.... it's just people being stubborn and only thinking in simple illogical ways because that is what is taught here... Japan is a country full of things that defy logic and don't work anywhere else in the world except Japan. I chose to live here due to family obligations here and also because of the massively beautiful creative art and music and movie scene to be found here. And some parts of Japanese culture I find truly exceptional. But... really, this is the darker, shittier side of Japan. This is the side of Japan you'll never see as a tourist, because you can't penetrate deep into Japan like I have... but when yo live here... you have that chance, and I have big dreams, and so with big dreams comes things like lost friendships, enemies, frustration. It's all part of what make the dreams so big. It's just unnecessary though, this particular situation. Completely irrational and unbelievable that this would happen. So, I am really kind of in awe because it's betrayal of friendship on the deepest level here... at least I guess that is not unique to Japan. Humans are shitty to each other all over the world. But I never thought it would be somebody who I felt was like my brother here. Shouganai. Shouganai. Shouganai. I'll build my own kingdom here. I'll do my own thing here. I don't really have any other choice at this point. But if this person wants to come back to me, I'll always be ready to accept this person with open arms. I guess that's the difference between me and this person... I am willing to forgive and forget. I will treat this person like I want to be treated... you know, if this person could just remember the Golden Rule, then it would not be so hard... forgive and move on. Anyway, happy to have seen you at the cheki session the other night. That is what I'll be focusing on... what works for me with what I'm doing in idol. That's about all I can do.

Wow Derek, I thought it was going to be a simple question (and only one among many), but thanks a lot for the extremely detailed answer! I heard many names that weren't in my radar, which means more stuff to discover. :) Thanks also for the nice words towards me. Yeah, I've been unlucky in the love department, but after a few years it doesn't really bug me too much anymore. My social skills and circle have been shrinking dramatically even before Covid stroke, so there are not many hopes at the moment. But if something eventually happens, it will be much welcomed, of course... It's really a bummer what happened with the BASE shop. Actually I'd dare to say it was borderline criminal what "they" did to you, sabotaging your business and fucking up with your reputation. :\ I'm not a religious person, but through life I've learned to not prejudge people in the basis of their religion grounds. I don't mind whether the people I'm interacting with are catholics, heathens, satanists, ásatrú/odinists, or pastafarians... I just care about they being honest, good people and not assholes (because there are many of these in all religious groups, or lack thereof). ;) Looking forward for the Miho session on tuesday! Most likely I'll be working from home as in the last three weeks (due to lockdowns in my part of the world too), so I won't need to be hiding this time. ;)

thank you so much for your comments. I can understand lying in situations where you feel threatened or scared. That makes total sense I think. It's just that sometimes in business here... it can be hard to understand the motivation behind it, as it's not always very clear, and that's where things get tripped up, I suppose. I appreciate the insight. Thank you! Yeah... the BASE shop closure is upsetting to me on many different levels, but it's also something I have to handle delicately for various reasons. Trust me... if it were anybody else who did this to me, I WOULD have been on the rampage about it, but... again... this being Japan and all... it's extremely difficult to do anything about it in my usual, preferred style. I have to be so so careful about what to do, or else it can cause many problems. The story ain't over though yet though...

I read about the BASE shop from Hanako-san's IG feed. I'm frankly surprised that you didn't tear the person who used to run that shop a new asshole. As for the thing about women lying to be polite - that's also a big thing in the West, and there's actually a good reason for it. To put it simply, it's to avoid getting hurt or killed.


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