Guilty as Sin - chapter 5

It's really such a fascinating thing, approaching Sutton and Charlotte essentially "for the first time" in a sense.

In Midnight Rain, it was an AU, but it's based on the TWW world, and their relationship and knowledge about one another is already pre-established. So, walking through their relationship with brand new eyes is something I'm having a lot of fun with.

Like, how would Charlotte actually respond to having a personal assistant (let alone someone as attractive as Sutton...)?

Oh, happy Galentine's Day, from our favorite gal-pals

--------------Guilty as Sin--------------

Chapter Five

Sutton came to an abrupt halt as she walked into the kitchen before work, staring at Regan in confusion. “I thought I smelled actual food cooking.”

And she had – the small stack of pancakes Regan had clearly just finished making were on the counter, and the accoutrements were all set out on their small kitchen table.

Her best friend turned around with a wide grin. “Ta-da!”

Sutton flicked her eyes to the clock above the stove just to make sure she hadn’t mixed up the time. 6:43a.m. She hadn’t. “When did you have time to do all of this? You weren’t even home by the time I went to bed last night.”

Though Regan kept a chaotic sleep schedule – if it could be deemed as such, which Sutton was dubious about – she did typically sleep in later than seven in the morning if she’d worked a later shift at the café the night before.

She frowned a little deeper. “Come to think of it, why weren’t you home when I went to sleep last night?”

Regan rolled her eyes before she promptly turned her back to Sutton to reach for the pancake platter. “Hey, it’s not my fault you’re in bed by seven o’clock.”

Rolling her eyes right back, Sutton corrected, “Ten on work nights, thank you very much. But I didn’t think you were working that late last night?”

Admittedly, Regan’s work schedule – much like her sleep times – was a bit chaotic. The only shift she never covered, if she could help it, was the true overnight. She was typically working at some point during the morning/mid-afternoon, occasionally evening shifts. So, Sutton wasn’t always sure when she’d find Regan at home or not.

But, Regan was also an over-communicator – if that was a thing – and frequently informed Sutton of her schedule even without prompting. And she could have sworn that Regan had told her she was getting off of her shift by seven Sunday night…

Regan shrugged. “Eh, hey, you know me. Sometimes I just get caught up at the café. Hanging out. People coming in late.”

Sutton eyes Regan critically as she turned around, suspicion buzzing right through her even if she couldn’t quite put her finger on why. What Regan said wasn’t untrue, but still.

Regan, pancake plate in hand, stopped mid-step, meeting Sutton’s narrow-eyed gaze with her own. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”

“Why did you just sound like that?” Sutton countered, studying Regan’s face closely.

Generally, Regan was an open book. To almost everyone, actually. Even when it came to the things Regan held back from most people – her issues with her family, mainly – she always shared them with Sutton.

So this was… weird.

“Sound like what?” Regan scoffed, dropping her gaze from Sutton’s as she placed the pancakes on the table with a flourish.

“I don’t know,” she answered, truthfully. Suspiciously. Because she didn’t know why Regan had sounded weird or why Sutton didn’t quite believe her.

“Let’s chalk it up to you still being sleepy, then.” Regan nodded, as she gestured again at the pancakes. “Now, sit down and have breakfast with me. You’re going to have to leave in, what, barely ten minutes to make sure you beat Charlotte-Workaholic-Thompson to the office?”

Breathing out a groan, Sutton managed to stave off that strange feeling. Regan wasn’t, by nature in any sense of the word, a liar, and certainly not to Sutton, and she had no reason to believe Regan would be hiding something from her, now.

She placed her bag on the floor before dropping into a chair, dismally. “If I can beat her,” she muttered, shaking her head as she put two pancakes onto her own plate.

It had been her goal every day that Charlotte was in the city for the last few weeks to beat her to the office. And even though Sutton always arrived by 7:45 – not due in until 8 – Charlotte was always there before her.

As she reached for the syrup, she paused, shooting another confused look at Regan. “Wait, so, why the pancake breakfast today?”

Regan was already hacking at her pancakes in the way she had that she’d done since they were kids, as she aimed her bright smile at Sutton again. “Oh! Happy one-month work anniversary!”

“You did this just to wish me a happy one-month work anniversary?” She asked slowly, glancing back down at her breakfast.

Granted, Regan did enjoy showing her affection for her loved ones by cooking for them, and, in general, by outward acts like this. So, she supposed it wasn’t crazy weird. But given this weird feeling she had regarding Regan already this morning…

“I’m proud of you, you ginger sunflower.” Regan reached out and pinched Sutton’s cheek deliberately obnoxiously.

Reaching up, she batted Regan’s hand away, even as she couldn’t help but smile back at her. “I appreciate the celebration, so thank you.” She took another bite of her breakfast, watching Regan intently as she chewed. After she swallowed, she couldn’t help but ask, “And… there is nothing else going on with you to motivate your early morning breakfast making?”

“Nope,” Regan answered, popping the p, before she took a giant bite of pancakes, herself.

Hmm.

“How’s everything with Emma at Topped Off?” She ventured, studying Regan’s expression closely.

Though she immediately slowed down her chewing, Regan didn’t show any other outward signs of… anything.

Emma had started working at the café – occasional nights and weekends – a few weeks ago. She knew that, per Regan and Emma, it was going “fine.” And everything else was relatively radio-silent on that front.

Which was baffling to her, because apparently it was only when her friends were around her that they felt the need to bicker, she supposed?! Again, suspicious.

But, frankly, she’d been so caught up in trying to prove to Charlotte that she could be the perfect assistant for the last month, she hadn’t had a ton of time to play detective and dig into anything. If Regan and Emma both reported that there were no issues she needed to be aware of, then she had to trust that. Meddling was much more Regan’s thing.

Regan swallowed, her lips tugging into a considering frown. “Oh, it’s good. We’re good. You know, the thing is, I’m actually way more curious about how everything is going with you at work. Any improvements?”

With that, Regan arched her a pointed stare.

And Sutton deflated, sitting back in her chair as that unwanted feeling curled through her. Unwanted but – unfortunately for her – becoming very familiar.

“No,” she admitted with a sigh.

“After all of the drama of the application, I can’t believe Charlotte’s turning out to be such a dud,” Regan commented, clicking her tongue in disapproval.

The disappointment that had weighed down on her completely scattered, replaced with sharp indignation. “I have never said that she’s a – a dud!”

She glared at Regan, feeling perhaps a little too insulted on Charlotte’s behalf. But she couldn’t help it, because Regan could not possibly be more categorically incorrect if she’d tried!

Regan shrugged, all blasé, cutting through more of her pancakes. “It’s been implied.”

“No, it has not,” she argued, pointing at Regan with her fork. “I’ve never once implied that.”

Because she hadn’t. Obviously, with how tightly her stomach twisted at the very implication, Sutton thought it was very clear she would never have even implied such a thing.

“I don’t have any issues with Charlotte as a person,” she firmly stated, and that was the absolute truth. “In fact, she’s – she’s amazing.”

She worked very hard to make sure that statement didn’t come out in any sort of inappropriate way. Did she feel a hint of awe when she thought about Charlotte, now that she spent some time with her? Of course, but… who wouldn’t feel that way? But she knew Regan would love to try to run with it if Sutton sounded anything but completely normal.

If anything, the last four weeks had only confirmed for Sutton what she’d gleaned about Charlotte through her election. Everything she’d witnessed from Charlotte just told Sutton that she’d been right to want to work with her. To know her.

She was just as brilliant as she’d appeared in the interviews and debates that Sutton had devoured. Whenever Sutton listened to Charlotte in meetings or on a phone call, she was never stumped by a potential situation or problem put in front of her, and she never said the wrong thing. Sutton very much admired that.

She was so dedicated and so hardworking, it was – honestly – a little concerning. Not that Sutton could express that, of course, but… Charlotte never stopped.

She arrived at work before eight a.m. every day, her head held high, shoulders back, striding through to her office like she owned the place and everyone in it.

Granted, she was the boss…

But it was more than that. The aura she carried was – it was something indescribably bigger. As if Charlotte held the weight of the world on her shoulders, and she knew it, but she wasn’t plagued by it. She gracefully juggled it while managing everything else on her plate.

Sutton didn’t quite know how to put it into words better than that, she just knew that it had taken her over a week to learn how to not simply sit back and marvel at Charlotte sometimes.

Because her days just never seemed to end.

Sutton was now the keeper of Charlotte’s schedule, and she saw how busy Charlotte was. And unless she had pressing work to attend to during business hours, she rarely ever blocked off times from meetings, getting her other work done sometime, indefinably, later. Which had to mean that even when Charlotte left and went home after a ten-hour workday, she was doing more work, then.  

People were constantly trying to get a hold of Charlotte, were in her office, or she was going out of office to meetings.

And it never seemed to wear on Charlotte. At least, not from what Sutton had seen.

She remained with her impeccable posture and fixed smiles and even tones and concise, clear plans. She was just constantly on. To the point that Sutton had no idea if Charlotte even knew how to exist, otherwise.

It was insane, and also insanely impressive.

Beyond that, she was always friendly to Sutton, always had a quick smile to send her way even on her busiest of days.

So, no, she had no complaints about Charlotte… as a person.

So far, everything she’d learned had told Sutton that Charlotte was a good person, trying to do good things, and that she actually knew how to go about doing them. As she’d started to frequently think – awe-inspiring.

Regan scoffed, sending her a look. “If she was so amazing, then why are you so unsatisfied?”

Feeling herself flush at Regan’s word choice, she snapped her mouth shut.

Technically, logically, Sutton knew she shouldn’t have anything to complain about.

And yet…

She picked at her pancakes, her bottom lip poking out in a thoughtful pout. “I just–” The alert she set on her phone to remind her of when she needed to be out the door sounded, and she cut herself off. “I have to go.”

“You only ate half of your breakfast.” Regan frowned, gesturing at Sutton’s plate.

Arching Regan a fondly exasperated look, she shook her head. “If I’d known that my one-month work anniversary was so important to you, I would have gotten up sooner.” Or, if Sutton had known that there was potentially something else going on with Regan, she could have planned aptly for that, too…

She paused as she stood, though, glancing back down at the food. It had been ingrained into her by her mother that having breakfast was important, and she’d barely even gotten to any of the fruit Regan had set out.

Quickly, she darted toward the cabinet they kept their Tupperware organized in, grabbed a couple of containers.

“That’s the spirit,” Regan encouraged, helping her load up the food that Regan, herself, wouldn’t be eating.

“Thank you for breakfast, I’m still suspicious of you, and I’ll see you tonight,” she rattled off, hurriedly reaching for her bag and hoisting it over her shoulder, before she reached for the containers on the table, starting toward the door.

“Maybe instead of being too concerned about me, you should think about yourself!” Regan called after her.

***

Unsurprisingly, even though Sutton arrived at exactly 7:43, Charlotte was already in her freaking office when she arrived at her own desk.

Of course.

Even though Sutton knew she wasn’t doing anything wrong – Charlotte had been very clear that Sutton’s job started at 8-on-the-dot – she couldn’t help but wonder… was this where she was falling short? Because she felt like she had to be doing something unsatisfactorily.

She studied Charlotte through her ajar door as she lifted her bag off and set it on her desk.

The thing was, she didn’t want to give Regan’s commentary any credence; Sutton didn’t dislike Charlotte, and she absolutely did not think that she was a dud.

And yet, she felt the same creeping disappointment tug at her that she’d felt for the last couple of weeks, especially when she looked down and saw her email from Charlotte that had arrived as she’d been walking in for the day.

Much like every other morning, Charlotte sent her an email that detailed what she wanted done for the day.

And, much like every other morning, the list was short, concise, and so, so, terribly simple. Predictable. Dull, even.

It was like… like she could literally feel Charlotte keeping her away from doing anything real or meaningful.

Gripping her phone tightly, she took a moment to breathe and bolster her courage.

Today was the day. Because she’d officially been here for a month, and she really couldn’t take any more of this.

With that in mind, she reached out for a couple of the containers she’d brought, and tapped on Charlotte’s door before she could talk herself out of this.

Charlotte’s gaze was fixed on her computer screen, before she slid it to Sutton. There was that little furrow to her eyebrows that she had when she was thinking intently about something or when she was making mental plans, her full, pink lips quirked to the side in thought. It was how Charlotte looked most frequently whenever Sutton peered in to see her in her office.

Her dark, wavy hair was down over her shoulders, looking as soft and glossy as it always did, resting over her white blouse. The sleeves were carefully rolled up to her elbows, but Sutton knew that Charlotte would roll them back down without leaving a trace of a wrinkle before she had to go to her meetings. She wore a pair of diamond earrings that glinted in the office lighting, her makeup done very subtly. As always, everything about Charlotte Thompson screamed both quiet, tasteful expense, in a way that Sutton found captivating.

“Good morning,” Charlotte greeted with one of her small, slightly crooked smiles.

Perfunctory, but not really personal.

Still, she latched onto that smile, letting it soothe over some of this anxiety as she shook herself out of her hesitation. Tapping the container against the palm of the hand not holding it, she pushed Charlotte’s door open enough that she could walk in toward the desk. “Um, good morning back.”

Immediately, she could feel Charlotte’s gaze on her face, studying her, and she knew Charlotte was reading into her nerves.

She knew because Sutton was well-aware she wasn’t all that great at hiding what she was feeling inside. She also knew because she’d witnessed Charlotte day-in and day-out, being able to read people like they were fucking books.

It was something she very much admired.

The reminder of that was also what gave her the conviction to push forward.

“What’s this?” Charlotte asked with muted interest, as Sutton hesitantly placed the containers on her desk. “Different than the usual morning offering?”

“Well, it’s homemade today. Not made by me, actually, but by my roommate,” she haltingly explained, feeling that heat creep up the back of her neck.

“Huh,” Charlotte hummed slightly, tilting her head down at the containers.

Even as hurriedly as the pancakes had been packed, though, they looked great. And Sutton had made sure to not mix up the containers, her own half-eaten breakfast remaining out on her own desk. That would be the last thing she’d need right now.

“I can run out and get you something different,” she offered quickly, forcing herself not to shift back and forth from foot to foot at just how unreadable Charlotte was to her right now.

Was she… insulted? Normally, Sutton got Charlotte something for breakfast between nine and ten in the morning, just as she was going to get Charlotte’s second coffee of the day, and it was always from a restaurant.

“No, no, this is fine. I was just not expecting it,” Charlotte murmured, quirking that friendly-but-polite smile up at Sutton. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome. I mean – if you’d prefer a homemade breakfast going forward, I can totally make that work, too. I usually don’t get myself anything when I go to grab yours; normally, I eat before I leave home. Typically, Regan doesn’t make breakfast, though. I usually just meal-prep things that are easy to grab on the go, like some overnight oats or mini egg cups, or–”

Snapping her mouth closed to force herself to stop rambling, Sutton tightly shut her eyes and cursed herself.

She’d done really well, not letting these ramblings out to Charlotte since working with her. Granted, that was likely because she didn’t actually speak to Charlotte all that much, so…

Swallowing tightly, she opened her eyes again and acted as though she couldn’t feel how deep her blush was. Acted as though she didn’t see the amusement alight in Charlotte’s keen honey-brown eyes as she looked up at Sutton from where she sat behind her desk.

Clearing her throat softly, Sutton murmured, “Sorry; I realize you didn’t ask for my morning routine.”

Though Charlotte was still very obviously amused, she tilted her head slightly and ran her eyes down Sutton’s face, then back up. “Is there something you’d like to discuss this morning, Sutton? Something other than your breakfast habits.”

Jesus, yep. That was how good Charlotte was at reading people!

“I – well, actually, yes.”

Apparently, she was really doing this. Her stomach tied in anxious knots, as she laced her fingers together tightly, and worried at the inside of her cheek.

“Is it about anything I sent you in your morning email?” Charlotte asked, inquisitively when Sutton didn’t immediately elaborate.

“Ah, kind of?” She hedged.

Here went nothing.

“I just – the truth is, that every morning when you send me that email, my job responsibilities are exactly the same.” In the most boring and meaningless way possible, she bit back. “I thought… I thought that after my first few days, even my first week – or two! – that I’d be doing more. Especially if I excelled at doing these rote assignments.”

The words that had been circling around in her mind fell out of her mouth, a desperation seeping into them.

But the truth was that Sutton was shockingly and unexpectedly… bored. Almost daily.

“You made such a point of telling me on my first day that I’d better be able to keep pace with you, after that second interview that was such a whirlwind, and I was ready for that,” she explained, catching and holding Charlotte’s eyes with her own, needing her to see how much Sutton meant this. “I’ve been ready for that, but I’m not… getting it? And the only thing I can think of is that I’m not fulfilling your expectations in some way.”

Oh, and there was the niggling sense of anxiety and concern that she was at the root of this; an issue with her own self-esteem she couldn’t quite entirely kick.

“Only I feel like I’ve done a decent job. And if you don’t feel that way, then I want you to tell me, so I can fix it. So… how do you feel about my job performance so far?” She pressed, unaware of just how hard her heart would be pounding while awaiting Charlotte’s answer. “Have I been performing satisfactorily for you?”

The thing was, though, that she respected Charlotte so much; even more after working for her.

So the idea that Charlotte might feel the complete opposite way about her? Especially if she felt that way from Sutton performing such menial tasks?

God, it would be a very low blow. One she wasn’t truly sure she was ready for.

Charlotte’s doe eyes widened, obviously taken aback. “I had no idea you’ve felt this way; I’m quite pleased with your performance, honestly. You’ve been very helpful. You were insistent during the hiring process that you’re intelligent and efficient, and I’ve found both things to be true in the last few weeks.”

“Then why don’t you use me?” Sutton pressed, leaning in slightly over Charlotte’s desk because she needed Charlotte to hear her.

She only realized how those words sounded once they’d actually left her mouth, especially in conjunction with the way she was leaning forward imploringly, and – quickly, she stood right back up, knowing that she was blushing even deeper.

Still, though, she stood firm, holding Charlotte’s gaze with her own.

Even if she’d phrased it a little… inappropriately, her question was valid, and had been plaguing her for weeks.

And she saw how Charlotte’s honey-brown eyes also widened even farther, before they narrowed.

Nerves rushing through her, Sutton felt another ramble bubbling up. “I don’t mean – I just meant, if you think I’m useful and intelligent and efficient, why am I still doing the same things now, a month in, that I did during my first week? Yes, I can clean, organize, do some scheduling, take some notes, get you meals,” she ticked off the list of her general daily activities, which were all reflected in the schedule Charlotte had sent her only ten minutes ago. “But I can do so much more than that.”

“You do recall that you were the one that informed me that you didn’t want this job to network or climb a ladder?” Charlotte reminded her, arching her a look.

Sutton waved that away. “Yes, of course I do. And I’m not even saying that’s what I want, now.”

Charlotte pursed her lips. “So, what are you saying, then? Are you unhappy working for me?”

“No!” God, was Sutton really messing this up so badly?! “I just – if you recall, what I also said to you when you hired me was that I wanted to learn from you. I wanted to get to know you, more personally.”

Sutton had wanted to work with Charlotte to try and understand how her mind worked. To see if there really was something that rang true about Charlotte’s dedication and ambition inside of her.

And though, yes, technically Sutton had gotten the job she’d wanted so badly, she didn’t feel like she knew Charlotte that well at all.

Everything she knew about Charlotte now was exactly what she’d supposed about her during her campaign. It was nice to have it confirmed, to see Charlotte in action. In fact, it was incredible and inspiring.

But she wasn’t getting anything deeper, anything beyond what the public could see about Charlotte.

She was gorgeous. She was smart. She was charming. She was eloquent. She was dedicated. And all of that was amazing. Awe-inspiring.

But – what else?

Sutton found, so intently, that she wanted to know. She wanted to understand Charlotte, to be able to delve into her mind, to see the reasoning behind her choices. Why did she do what she did? How was she so sure of herself? And she’d really felt like being Charlotte’s personal assistant would give her that insight.

But she’d gotten so very little by way of anything deeper than surface level.

If “closed off” was a person, it was Charlotte Thompson – that was what Sutton had learned thus far.

It was frustratingly, dismally, thoroughly disappointing.

Charlotte’s gaze cooled, a firm expression sliding over her face. “I’m not here to be personal with you, Sutton; I’m here to be your boss. I apologize if you believed anything else was going to happen in this position.”

This time, it was Sutton that found herself blinking across the desk at Charlotte’s turn of phrase.

Charlotte’s cheeks flushed softly, but she leveled Sutton with a look of absolute resolve. Hard enough that it made Sutton want to shrink back.

She pushed through, holding onto her own resolve. “I’m not saying that I thought we would become best friends or anything like that.”

Frankly, she wasn’t sure Charlotte even had friends! She thought better of saying that, too, just barely preventing it from slipping out.

Maybe her brother or Dean, her former boss? They seemed to be the only people she ever had any personal communication with. Granted, no, Sutton didn’t know what Charlotte did on her off-time, but she allowed herself such little off-time, that Sutton couldn’t imagine she had any real relationships or even hobbies.

Unless Dean, the mayor and her former boss were the relationship?!

That was something she maybe should try to look into.

And if that wasn’t the case, maybe this really was it; maybe this really was all there was to Charlotte, and Sutton should take that as her lesson here?

But… she couldn’t quite get fully on-board with that. Even if Charlotte seemed to hold her – and nearly everyone else that Sutton had observed – at arms’ length, even if Sutton couldn’t exactly read Charlotte, she just felt like there was more under the surface.

More Sutton wanted to know, to see, to understand.

Which was what drove her forward. “What I’m saying is that… I want to learn from you.” She stressed, sincerity etching into her every syllable. “I’m more than happy to do everything I already do now, but I want to have the opportunity to do more. Sorting mail and memos and answering phone calls isn’t the only kind of work relationship I’d set out to have, here. There are a million other jobs for a million other random people I could have applied for if that was all I was looking to do for someone.”

She supposed this was a make-or-break moment, right? Either they’d walk out of this catch-up with Charlotte deciding she wanted to continue with Sutton or not, so she figured she should lay all of her cards on the table.

“For eighty percent of the last two weeks, you were in D.C. but had me stay behind here. And when you are here, you’ve only had me go to meetings with you a handful of times.” God, she hoped that she didn’t sound as exasperated as she felt. Even so, she couldn’t help it.

The last couple of weeks, when it had started to dawn on her that this might be her daily life while working for Charlotte, she’d grown so listless.

“Even when it comes to your emails – that was something I was supposed to take over.” Sutton stared imploringly at Charlotte, willing her with everything she had inside to agree. “And I thought that in the first week, possibly even two, perhaps you were letting me adjust…” She rolled her lips, trying to hold back her next comment. Which didn’t work very well, as she blurted it out anyway. “Or that you were adjusting to having me here.”

She could see the way Charlotte’s eyes narrowed ever-so-slightly, but Sutton wanted her to know that from the very first day she’d seen how Charlotte had seemed to struggle in giving Sutton control over responsibilities Charlotte had always viewed as her own. No, she didn’t voice it, and she didn’t even overtly act like it.

But Sutton – despite how guarded Charlotte really was – could see that clear as day.

“Maybe you’ve been being patient with me, but…” She swallowed, hard, gathering her inner-strength to manage to push out, “I’ve also been trying to be patient with you. I’m with you enough that I see how busy you are, constantly. You’ve given me just enough to do so that you aren’t completely overrun day-to-day.”

And that was the crux, wasn’t it? Charlotte might have hired a personal assistant, but she’d only given just enough of her responsibilities over so that she wasn’t in the state she’d been in the day Sutton had started – papers and mail on her desk, tidying up desperately needed, barely eating lunch.

“I’m happy to do those things,” she stated, softly, leaning in closer, hoping Charlotte could see that she was telling the truth.

She liked Charlotte, she respected her, and she took pride in the small, simple tasks she could do to make her daily routines run smoothly.

“But I can do more,” she insisted. “I feel like – like you hired me to do more?” Maybe that was over-stepping; after all, she certainly couldn’t read Charlotte’s mind. But she couldn’t help feeling that if Charlotte could just trust her a little bit more, Sutton could make it beneficial for the both of them.

“So, if you think I’ve done a good job at everything you’ve given me so far, then why won’t you let me?” With that raw, beseeching question, Sutton felt the inner-fight kind of… bleed out of her, leaving her across from Charlotte, feeling strangely vulnerable. “I really feel like I can make your life better, if you just give me a chance to dive in with you.”

And she held her breath, desperately hoping she hadn’t crossed a line.

Because even though she didn’t feel properly utilized or entirely fulfilled, she didn’t want to be fired, and –

Charlotte stared intently at her, before she closed her eyes for a few seconds, her lips pursing together tightly. Oh, boy. Her nerves tangled together tightly; maybe she had pushed too far. Maybe Charlotte had hired someone that she’d thought would simply fall in line and not ever press her for anything.

Finally, when she opened her eyes again, there was a grim determination in them, and Sutton braced herself for impact.

It would be fine, she told herself. Even though she felt like there was so much more she could do here, so much more she wanted to learn from Charlotte, to know about her, she’d be fine.

“You’re right,” Charlotte stated in that calm, measured tone she had.

Sutton nearly fell over in shock. “I’m – I am?”

Slowly, Charlotte nodded as she interlocked her fingers where they rested on her desk. “While you have made my day-to-day a lot more manageable, I haven’t really stepped back enough to allow you to take anything over. Not meaningfully, anyway. And, in doing so, I’ve also – subconsciously – held you back from taking any steps in developing your professional skills.” She frowned, those full lips twisting in displeasure. “For that, I do truly apologize.”

All of the tension that had gripped her melted away in relief. “God. Okay. Good. Thank you.” Literally, she felt her entire posture and body language completely shift, from uncomfortably tight to lax.

Undeniable amusement sparked in Charlotte’s eyes as she studied Sutton’s response. “What were you so concerned about?”

“I really thought it was fifty-fifty odds that you were going to fire me,” she answered, unashamedly, as she smiled at Charlotte. “I’m so glad it didn’t go in that direction.”

Charlotte frowned at her, recoiling slightly, her displeasure blatant. “Fire you? I realize I might not have made myself overly available to you in the last few weeks, but I wouldn’t fire you for stating legitimate complaints.”

Okay, some of the easy relief that had just slid through her waned, and she worried at the inside of her cheek. Should she assure Charlotte that she didn’t think she was some sort of raging monstrous boss? Should she let Charlotte know that Sutton was well-aware of her own insecurities that she carried, that likely could have bled over?

That was what almost slipped out, but luckily Charlotte spoke first.

“Why don’t you bring a chair over here?” Charlotte gestured to the spot next to her on the other side of the desk. “We’ll go through some of my emails and responses, together, so you can get accustomed to what I want from you in that regard.”

Sutton snapped up straight, excitement trilling through her. Okay, so being direct with Charlotte seemed to grant her an immediate response.

As she pulled one of the chairs around, the pit of her stomach tingled with anticipation.

Yes, she’d worked for Charlotte for a month, but the only time she’d been on this side of the desk was to clean it when Charlotte wasn’t in her office. This felt very different.

She sat down, careful to not bump her knees against the sleek desk or against Charlotte’s – she was wearing a skirt today, Sutton was able to see for the first time this morning.

It wasn’t surprising, given that it was abominably hot outside, plus she’d learned that Charlotte had a wide array of suits – both pants and skirts, all well-tailored and styled.

Swallowing hard, Sutton felt that other tingling feeling buzz to life inside of her, as she continued to stare down at Charlotte’s thighs.

Well, what she could see of Charlotte’s thighs.

Her suits were entirely office appropriate, of course. When she stood and brushed her hands over her skirt to smooth it out, the material would fall to cut right over Charlotte’s knees.

Very appropriate. Great.

But when she was sitting like this, one leg crossed over the other, the material rode up several inches – as much as it could, given the unforgiving material – like it was gripping Charlotte’s thighs for dear life.

Her heart thudded in her chest, heat sparking through her, before she deliberately closed her eyes and shook her head.

The only good thing about Charlotte spending over half of the time that Sutton had been in her employ in D.C. was that Sutton didn’t need to grapple with the fact that her boss was legitimately the most attractive woman she had ever seen in real life.

Coupled with how the last weeks had played out, with Charlotte handling Sutton with guarded kids gloves when it came to work, it had been very easy to focus on that rather than…

Her gaze dipped again, of its own accord.

Well, rather than on those thighs. Or any other part of Charlotte. Like the way her full chest looked when she was done with her meetings and would undo one or two of her buttons as she settled into her office at the end of the day. Or the flush on her cheeks from the humidity outside whenever Sutton had accompanied her to a meeting when Charlotte was in the city. Or how incredibly soft her hair looked.

Or how amazing she smelled. That was a big one, really, because Charlotte always smelled absolutely incredible – enticing, truly – and her perfume always lingered whenever she walked by Sutton’s desk. Which was several times a day.

Sutton was so proud of herself for not having discussed with Regan, in any way, the fact that she did spend some of the countless downtime she had at work thinking about how beautiful Charlotte was. She would never hear the end of it, and that was the last thing she needed.

“All right,” Charlotte said, pulling Sutton’s attention back to where it should be.

Feeling herself blush, and her stomach twist with worry that she’d gotten caught, she darted her eyes up. Only to feel the relief rush through her, as Charlotte’s attention was still fixed on her computer.

Charlotte swiveled in her seat slightly as she turned to face Sutton. As their knees brushed, Sutton felt a buzz zip right through her, and she blinked widely back at Charlotte, hoping she had no idea.

It wasn’t Charlotte’s fault, responsibility or business that her disastrously bisexual assistant was attracted to her, and that was a hill Sutton had decided she’d be dying on.

If Charlotte had any inkling of what was on Sutton’s mind, though, neither her face nor her voice gave it away.

“I realize this may feel like I’m trying to micro-manage you,” Charlotte’s voice was so soft. Because she didn’t need to be louder; Sutton was barely a foot away. Their knees were brushing together ever so slightly, still. “But the reality is that I do struggle with this. You – anyone – being the first point of contact for me? Responding to emails meant for me? Even though you’ll assert yourself as my assistant, it’s my voice on the line.”

There was a raw honesty in her tone that Sutton, despite having worked with her for weeks now, hadn’t heard a hint of.

It settled inside of her, taking root, and blossoming into something she very much liked. Something that made Charlotte so much more – normal. Human. Rather than the person that was constantly on-the-go with no end in sight.

It was kind of… endearing. Which was an odd thing to think about Charlotte Thompson, but, here they were.

“I understand,” she assured, sitting up straight and looking directly into Charlotte’s eyes, hoping she’d be able to see just how much Sutton meant this. “The last thing I want is for you to feel like I’d misrepresent you or mishandle your communication. I’m happy to walk through it with you, so that we’re on the same page.”

Without thinking better of it, she dropped her hand to Charlotte’s forearm and squeezed, gently. Truly just wanting her to feel how genuine Sutton was in that.

Charlotte’s dark eyes dropped down and latched onto Sutton’s hand, staring for several beats. Sutton froze.

And Charlotte gently but obviously intently lifted her arm to start scrolling through her emails, making Sutton’s hand fall back down into her lap.

All right, so maybe that was a little too personal. Fair enough.

Charlotte cleared her throat, gesturing to her screen. “All right, so…”

***

Did Charlotte immediately open up to her after that conversation?

No but Sutton felt like it was the door to a new stage being opened for them, and for that, she was fucking thrilled.

Charlotte didn’t find her unsatisfactory. She thought Sutton was doing a good job.

The fact that it was about Charlotte and her reluctance to open up – after all, she did tell Sutton on her first day that this was her first time having a personal assistant and that it would be a bit like trial by fire – made Sutton feel very confident.

She could get Charlotte to be more comfortable with her, she was sure of it.

In fact, it was already starting, even throughout this past work week, since they’d had that conversation.

Wednesday, when Charlotte was leaving the office to go to a meeting, and she paused as she passed Sutton’s desk. She’d been prepared to stay back, as this was one of the meetings Charlotte had gone to every week that she was in the city, but Sutton had never been instructed to go with her.

“Why don’t you join me?” She’d suggested, instead.

Sutton had nearly made a fool of herself with how fast she’d jumped up from her chair to comply.

She’d surprised Sutton even more on the ride to the meeting.

Generally, whenever Sutton did accompany Charlotte somewhere, they were generally very quiet. Mostly because Charlotte was usually answering her emails.

This ride, however, Charlotte cleared her throat to get Sutton’s attention. “I like to keep regular meetings with Mr. Collingswood, as you’ve seen.”

Sutton was surprised, but undeniably eager to hear more. She nodded. “I’ve noticed.” Even so, she frowned. “I just… I mean, why? He wasn’t super supportive of your election.”

“No, he wasn’t. But he’s one of my wealthiest and most influential constituents, who likes to have his voice heard.” She rolled her eyes – the slightest bit, but Sutton saw it, before Charlotte caught herself, and her expression smoothed out again, looking impervious. “These meetings are largely ineffective, but the reality is letting him feel his voice is heard gains a lot of his support, whether or not I actually agree with him. He doesn’t necessarily care how I represent him, as long as he feels he is represented. It can be somewhat of a delicate balance.”

Sutton found herself nodding, running Charlotte’s words over in her mind.

And she realized, more than a bit giddy at it, that Charlotte was telling her this to give Sutton a window into her process.

Because she’d actually listened to her.

“Seven o’clock on a Friday night. You’re already wearing your lounge clothes. Sutton, Sutton, Sutton,” Regan tsk’d out her name as she breezed into the living room.

She rolled her eyes, re-balancing her laptop on her thighs.

Her movement seemed to draw Regan’s attention, though, and she froze in place. “Are you working? God, this is worse than I thought.”

Defensively, she closed her laptop so that Regan couldn’t see what she was doing.

Which… she was answering some of Charlotte’s emails, but it needed to get done! She wasn’t going to lobby for more responsibility from Charlotte, and fall short the same freaking week.

Besides, she kind of enjoyed it. And, if she did say so herself, she felt she was able to mirror Charlotte’s tone very well.

“You’re going to work right now, are you not?” She shot back, gesturing at Regan.

Her hair was up in a ponytail, and she was wearing jean shorts and a t-shirt – definitely not clothing Regan typically wore for a night out.

Regan’s expression was sheer offense. “I work an untraditional job! You should be off-the-clock.”

“Being a personal assistant doesn’t mean I keep super traditional hours, either,” she defended.

Granted, Charlotte hadn’t really utilized Sutton as much on weekends or evening as she could… as much as Sutton wished she would.

Baby steps, she reminded herself.

“Much as I’d love to urge you to take advantage of the fact that Charlotte-Workaholic-Thompson is not making you work day and night, I have to go. I’ll be home late, long after you, my precious gemstone, are tucked away in bed,” Regan sang out, sending her a wink.

“I’ll miss you so much, I’m not sure how I’ll survive it,” she dryly shot back.

She waited until she was sure Regan was gone, before she opened her laptop again.

Keeping Regan and Charlotte as separate as possible was of complete importance in her mind. Not only because of the application debacle, but because Charlotte was so private.

Which… maybe that was because of her grandmother? After all, Charlotte’s family had been in the public eye for a long time, in ways even Sutton couldn’t relate to, in spite of their family similarities.

But Sutton was determined to help Charlotte, if only to make Charlotte understand that she could rely on and trust Sutton.

Hell, maybe once Charlotte let Sutton take over some more responsibilities, she’d even have time to spend on her own personal life.

She’d love if she could help facilitate that. Charlotte was so, so beautiful.

Like. Just. Ethereally so.

And successful and driven and smart.

She deserved to take a little break from work and actually enjoy her life. And if that coincided with she and Sutton getting a little closer, with Sutton being able to understand Charlotte better, then it was a positive thing all-around, right?

She paused before clicking on the next email, tilting her head in confused surprise.

From: Vanessa Logan

Like… the morning talk-show host, Vanessa Logan?

Granted, Charlotte had done stints on the news, but… Vanessa Logan’s show was less about politics and more about entertainment, featuring different up-and-coming singers or actors.

Subject: I thought that was you

… and what in the world did that mean?

Charlotte –

Color me absolutely amazed. I mean, when I had you sign the NDA after the night we spent together last year, I really thought it was only to protect myself.

I didn’t realize how much you were also benefitting from it. At least, not until I’d started to see your picture pop up in a campaign with the last name “Thompson” attached. And then things started to make a little bit more sense.

I’ve debated whether or not I should reach out to you for several months now. But even as time goes on, I still think about our night together. And I think about how I believe we’re in very similar situations (at least, from what I can gather).

I’d love to meet up again sometime. Maybe we can work something out.

Excited to hear from you,
Vanessa

Was… was that a bomb exploding in the back of Sutton’s mind, she dimly wondered? Because that’s what it felt like. Especially with the way her ears were now ringing, and her face felt so hot, and…

What did this mean?!

The – the night Charlotte had spent together… with another woman… that involved privacy and signing an NDA.

All of the “progress” she thought she’d made in the last week was completely, utterly gone.

Because now, what Sutton was sure of more than anything, was that she didn’t know a damn thing.

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