PATREON EXCLUSIVE: How To Not Resent Your Partner For Prioritizing Your Children Above You

It makes sense women would save the children over the husband since the husband has a better chance of escaping on his own

Jeffery Tang

I met a woman years ago - nothing really happened between us, but we became friends for a while. I was a tad baffled when she just got pregnant by her will, with another man - that she really didn't like - and didn't tell him what she did. The father didn't know she was pregnant, and he didn't know he bacame a father. She also trash talked a good friend (who I had some love interest in) from high school - about two decades after me and my high school friend lost contact. She didn't know I had a love interest in her, and I never told her. I didn't recognise anything she said about my friend, a very sweet girl at the time. We just lost contact after about one or two years after her pregnancy. I don't know if she told the father. A true low quality woman, even if she had her good treats in some way - but nothing is really black or white about a person. I don't really miss our friendship. Who knows what could've happened if she got angry with me at some point?

Robert Lindhé

dafuq this comment has to do with the subject of the video? If that was a joke, it's not clear that this is a joke. If this was your attempt to mock him, that was not cool man. You better do something better with your life and time.

Agree 100%. My mom is a really emotionally needy person and I'm so glad I can step in and protect my younger sister from unnecessary traumatic experiences because I started watching your channel.

I like the last couple of paragraphs in your comment. I think it goes very well with the notion of "difference feminism" that AG has alluded to on one of hif YouTube videos. I mean sure, you could be strong and independent but actively trying to thrust it out there is weak, IMO. It might be fun to do everything yourself but it's even more fun to do it with someone else. And as one playing the nurtuting and supporting half, your ability to step in and do everything yourself does not have to take away from that role. You could still "supervise" and "cheerlead"!

Ashwin Srinivas

Yo AG, have you been vaccinated yet? Which one did you take? Was the nurse that jabbed you a high quality woman?! We need to know.

Ashwin Srinivas

A brilliant video, I don't have any kids myself yet but having this problem identified will help me in the future to make sure my man doesn't ever feel like that! Thank you Alexander! xxx

Alisha

Oof, the parenting style issue is a big one.  From around age 12 I started developing thoughts on how I would raise my children. I had my child at age 32. So for 20 years I refined this plan and worked toward it.  When the baby came, 2 hallmarks of my plan immediately flew out the window.  So I feel even the best prepared mother still cannot predict the exact parenting style she will like. I have no idea how a man would cope with that, other than just being aware it will happen.

Jennifer Coopman

So smart, what a fabulous video, thank you! As a mom, this hits close to home and I agree 100% with everything. Some additional things that came to mind, based on my own experience: Alexander's statement about the kind of love, as a mother to a father, is true.  He is also right about how a mother might remain attracted to the father.  For me, seeing my husband be a strong, attentive leader of our kid actually made me more sexually attracted to him.  (He wasn't always the greatest father, so it was a total surprise to me the first time I noticed that correlation.)  So it's possible to feel the old 'boyfriend' love AND the 'teammate' love. He alluded to this, but I wanted to be more explicit.  Those types of love are not mutually exclusive and one shouldn't end just because the other begins. Which I'm currently finding is critical to avoiding that feeling Alexander described after the kids move out and you find you don't even know or like your partner.  The feeling of going back to behaving like you did when you were dating is something exciting that my husband and I are looking forward to when our kid grows up.  They are a teenager now and my husband and I are already planning the stuff we will do together when they go to college or move out.  It's so fun! Plus, I think watching the parents make plans together that no longer include them helps prepare them for the fact that they will have to move out soon, and they need to start becoming as independent as possible. Regarding the 'needing her less' theory,  I propose flipping that around for the modern feminist woman: Need him more. I know, it sounds like a nightmare for both your average manosphere guy (god, she's already so needy) and your average feminist (what the hell do I need him for). But as a feminist myself, I found danger in being so 'strong and independent' prior to kids that you try to prove how much you don't need him, or end up doing everything for him. Even if you currently feel like you don't want or need his help, my advice is to let him. Then maybe after the baby it won't be such an adjustment.  I think there is a responsibility there for a woman to help her man out in that regard. 

Jennifer Coopman

Unfortunately, my best friend from college not only deprioritized her husband when she had her first child, she placed him firmly in the role of ATM, sperm donor, and pack mule. He did not agree with her parenting style so she not only stopped treating him as a husband, she didn’t treat him as a father to her children, or even as a man she respected. 10 years (and two more kids) later, he finally asked for a divorce. There is being somewhat deprioritized, which maybe you can accept, especially in the kids’ early years. But then there is being disregarded, disrespected, or denigrated. Hopefully people can tell the difference and never accept the latter.