PATREON EXCLUSIVE: Do You Need Social Media To Demonstrate Status To Women?

You can boil female attraction in the modern world to two things: Genetics + Lifestyle. = Use Instagram to market your Genetics + Lifestyle (incl. showing off social status, travel, material status items, your house, your pets etc. what ever has superficial "value") I agree all complete bullshit.. but is works on getting dates apparently.. and I believe it. If you look the part, you get the part! Women are survivalist, no backbone, no morals, does not stand for anything, the fall for the guy who has everything. (shocking)

William Redfire

Alex V, I think you are totally correct and I think that advice applies to girls too. In fact, I used it on my 15 yr old daughter. We have been a strict no social media family with little online activity.  I have no social media and, except for commenting here and on YouTube videos, I have no online presence. Neither does my husband, although he had a Facebook page for a while several years ago. Until recently, we have been aggressively monitoring our daughter's online activity and our parental controls on her phone are downright tyrannical.  But she (and we) have been facing pressure to lighten up. So I've been using different tactics here and there to gauge her maturity level toward social media. I framed this most recent attempt as a 'what do you think about this opinion' and I read most of your post out loud to her. When I got to the part about being 'mature enough to not care that much about what others think of them.. chase excellence in the real world and not trying to pose for photos...constantly check their likes...' she got excited and said 'Yes! THAT'S the kind of boy I want!' Wow! She was so vehement about it I couldn't help but laugh out loud. And when I read her the part where you said 'show status in the real world first, guys. Social media should be the garnish' she said 'That's how I want to be'.  Your words struck such a chord with her that I didn't even have to make a lecture out of it!  So thank you for writing such an engaging and articulate post! It also made wonder if teens aren't already aware of the negative effects of social media on their and their friends lives, and they are secretly wanting to see adults model conservative online behavior for them, sort of give them tacit permission to buck the current trend.

Jennifer Coopman

Let's not forget some women actually preffer guys with a default profile picture (no profile picture) on their social media accounts and not many posts on their timeline; Guys that are also articulate and know how to use their vocabulary to flirt and understand female psychology. Why? Because it signals to them these guys are mature enough to not care that much about what other think of them and busy enough to chase excellence in the real world and not trying to pose for photos all day long and constantly check their likes and followers. That's female domain, usually. Like a woman doesn't like you to shave your body more that she does and spend more time in the shower than she does, so I think it can be said about social media. If you spend more time on it that she does, it signals you have to much free time and not pursuing great things. Show status in the real world first, guys. Social media should be the garnish. Not the other way around. If you want to be present on these apps, be present with some good photos that are highlights of your great life (you should make one for yourself). Post from time to time. If you want to have a profile picture, keep your look updated every so often so you're not having a photo with you from 10 years ago as a profile picture, but don't change it like once a week or once a month. That's too much in my view. Although nobody likes to be catfished, so it should from time to time reflect your image. And remember, also nobody has a great life 24/7. So the posts should not try so hard to convey that you have one constantly. As for the number of followes and comments being an indicative of status, I would say that the people you know in real life and stop on their way to talk to you when you meet them, the network you can navigate in real world and use in need, shows so much value than how many followers you have. You could have 100 followers instead of 100k. If those followers are high value individuals and you can call them any time for help on a matter, that's a quality circle that has your back. Quality over quantity, always. Want to show status? Have a quality course that's bought multiple times, in your field of work. Have a book that helps people daily. Have a video online that shares an eye-opening idea and people take notice of (like Alexander does here). Social media has it's pros. I'm on it, just not that visible. What's your take on this, Alex? What do you think guys? Am I wrong on this one? Maybe we have some females in here to offer us a point of view as well :)

I agree. I don't like or have a use for social media. There are threats that come from being on the grid such as a crazy ex finding you, or low quality people from your past. There are employees that have lost their jobs because of their posts. There are businesses that are being boycotted because of the owners political views. But I see one useful feature. Look at the people you know in the real world and the places you go as a venn diagram. If you never change your habits and dont make conscious effort to expand your venn diagram, you may never meet someone that is just beyond what you can see.

That concern definitely feels like a younger generation thing, because significant social media presence/activity does not indicate “status” to me at all. I actually see it as a red flag and proceed with caution. It’s fascinating, but kind of hurts my heart, to know so much has changed that one might view something like living a life outside of social media as a negative.

I kinda disagree with the superficial part, I think attraction is always superficial, for both genders. Men will be attracted by looks, women by status etc. but that doesn't mean that's all we care about in the relationship. So just because the likelihood of me approaching a beautiful woman over an average looking woman is much higher doesn't mean I only value beauty and same for women, just because she was attracted by your status or your money doesn't mean she only wants that. Think of it like your YouTube thumbnails and titles, they are of course made to attract as many viewers as possible, to evoke an emotion. While your content might not resonate with everyone, in the end you will still get more patrons that way than with boring, more objective thumbnails and titles. In the same way a social media presence increases your number of potential partners but of course you still have to filter and find one that's high quality among them.

If you're gonna use social media to talk to girls you should.