TAIYANG OMAKE 1

Omake for Jaune's Pineapple Jam Part 2.
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Two days before Team RWBY returns to Beacon.

After recovering from the death of his wife, Taiyang Xiao Long was a man of focus, sheer will, and indomitable resolve when it came to taking care of her daughters.

Yet, even a man as resolute as he, faltered when faced with the responsibility of taking care of four teenage girls for months on end.

Blake Belladonna and Weiss Schnee were two wonderful girls he was thankful for to have as Ruby and Yang’s friends.

But, there was only so much teenage drama one can take.

And those two?

Their lives were full of drama.

The worst came, however, during a day like any other.

Taiyang was just about to cook while Qrow lazed about on his couch when they heard screaming from the girls’ bedroom.

Both men looked at each other, and it only took one second for one of them to move first.

“NOT IT!” Qrow shouted, and Taiyang groaned as he girded himself to walk upstairs.

It had been months since Qrow arrived with the girls from Beacon, and throughout those months, the two men had learned that not every emergency the girls experienced was a real emergency.

He shivered as he remembered her daughters running out of…pads.

And with four teenage girls living under his roof, more often than not the emergencies only needed one of them to assist the girls.

It didn’t change for the past few months, and it wasn’t going to change now.

“You know, you really should do something instead of just lazing around.” Taiyang grumbled, taking the apron off of him as he turned towards Qrow.

“Hey, I babysit when you’re off working at Signal.” Qrow grinned, shooting Taiyang with finger guns as he lazed on his couch.

“You work at Signal too, Qrow!” Taiyang shouted, pinching the bridge of his nose as he began to walk upstairs.

Qrow, however, only laughed before patting his stomach.

“Didn’t you hear? I’m recovering from a stab wound.”

Taiyang only rolled his eyes at that.

“It’s been months, Qrow. You’re already healed.”

“Not when I have to train a full team of Huntresses!” Qrow shot back with a laugh, but Taiyang only ignored him as he walked up to the girls’ shared bedroom.

Muffled shouts came out from the other side, and Taiyang had the sinking feeling furniture were also being broken.

Letting out a big sigh, he knocked on the door to let his presence be known.

“Girls, are you alright?”

Any other time, the noise would have suddenly stopped.

This was not any other time.

Even now, he could hear screaming and struggling from inside. Whatever has got them riled up, it must be important for them to ignore his presence.

Finally having enough of it, he turned the doorknob and barged in with a shout.

“I’m coming-”

Whatever he was going to say next was swallowed down his throat as he looked at the scene with wide eyes.

Yang had Blake under her arms, while Weiss was reaching out over her shoulder.

What was she reaching for, you ask?

There, standing in the middle of the chaos, was his sweet, little, daughter, Ruby Rose.

Holding a dildo like it was the championship belt for Remnant’s Royal Rumble.

Taiyang blinked.

Ruby blinked.

Yang blinked.

And both Blake Belladonna and Weiss Schnee blinked, as they all turned towards him.

Silence, blessed silence, filled the room as they all froze in horror.

Taiyang could not say anything, because it was at that moment, did that dildo start to vibrate.

Ruby gasped, her face turning red, and Taiyang could only step back and slowly close the door in front of him.

“IT’S NOT WHAT-”

SLAM!

Whatever else Ruby was going to say was drowned out by Taiyang slamming the door in a hurry.

“Nope, nope, nope! I am not equipped for this!” He muttered, rambling the words as he ran down the stairs with cold sweat dripping down his back.

Whatever the hell that was, he did not want to be a part of it.

No father did.

“Hey, what’s up with-”

“NOT NOW, QROW!” He shouted, marching past his teammate as he ran out of his own house.

Blood pounded through his ears, and it was perhaps the worst time for this to happen, but suddenly, inexplicably, a red portal formed outside his house.

Taiyang blinked.

Raven blinked.

And dead bear over her shoulders slumped down into the ground.

Great, another problem.

Taiyang could only groan as he heard Zwei bark behind him.

“Another one, Raven? Really?”

“Is this a bad time?” She asked back, tilting her head as if he said something unreasonable.

“You can’t just keep leaving dead animals here!”

Raven, however, only shrugged at that before nodding her head at Zwei.

“Why not? Zwei seems to like it.”

“Zwei likes it because you keep feeding him.” Taiyang growled before waving a hand at his dog, who was now glancing back and forth between them. “Look at him, Raven! Just look at him!”

To her credit, Raven did look at Zwei, but her observation of the situation left much to be desired.

“I don’t see the problem-”

“HE’S FAT!”

It was true.

Zwei was now fat. 

His boy was already fluffy before, but now…he was just soft.

A soft, round, mass of fur, that looked at Taiyang with pitiful eyes.

“You’ve bribed him with your food.” He said with a straight face.

Raven, however, only smirked at him.

“It’s not my fault Zwei appreciates the gifts of the hunt. Besides, I just bring the bodies. You’re the one who cooks it.”

Taiyang’s eyebrow twitched at that.

She was right.

He was the one who cooked the food Raven brought anytime, but it wasn’t because he wanted to accept her gifts or anything, oh no, it was because it was the practical thing to do.

After all, feeding four teenagers and two Huntsmen was no easy work. So again, cooking the food Raven brought from time to time was just being practical.

At least, that’s what he tells himself.

“Fine. I’ll cook it.” He sighed resignedly before freezing as he heard a voice behind him.

“DAD! IT’S NOT-”

Before he knew it, he was running towards Raven.

“TAKE ME!”

Raven reeled back, her eyes widening at the sudden shout. “I-what?! Here?! Now?!”

She could only blush, however, when Taiyang suddenly grabbed her shoulders.

“TAKE ME ANYWHERE NOT HERE!”

And just like that, Raven cut a portal behind Taiyang and pushed him in.

Light exploded around him and the next thing Taiyang knew, he was flat on his back and looking at the sun through the leaves of a forest.

He grunted, however, when he felt a weight crash onto him. Looking down at the source, he saw his ex-wife straddling him with a grin on her face.