The Soulless Muse

Man coming up with a title for this was rly hard :/// all I knew is that it had to have some variation of the world “soulless” in there lol.

Anyway, I tired to draw Asta in a different style today. While I actually rly like this strange lineless style, it sapped all my energy. Took me two hours to do!!

Anyway, I’ve been avoiding talking about Astarte and what they experienced after they arrived at their destination, ready to start a new life.

Well, they did! They got there, Erasyl being the person he is, helped them find a great job at Madam Danahy’s townhouse. Having taken the experiences they had on the journey here and being swayed by Erasyl’s general warmness, Asta made friends. Friends all around town. Tried to socialize and in turn was welcomed and felt at home there. Then they met a man. And that man was like the sun. That man made Asta feel funny. Like a blooming flower. Being with that man felt wonderful. And before they knew it, they called that man their husband. It was so quick, and so sudden, but Asta didn’t think it was the wrong decision. Settling down and marrying this man.

It was good for a few months, and Asta thought that they had finally achieved a normal life. A good life. But that life would not last. That peaceful seaside town was polluted by a drug lord. Bovaird was his name. New on the scene and hungry for success. Hungry for wealth and power and glory. And seizing a port town to facilitate trade was his goal. To achieve that goal, he had to find a way of swaying the noble that governed that port town. A seemingly staunch noble who so bravely resisted any attempts at bribery. But Bovaird was a cunning man. An observative man. And in no time, he came to know that the governor’s eyes always wandered to one of three servants who worked for Madame Danahy.

Now, it was obvious that Bovaird knew something that nobody else knew. Otherwise, his actions seemed extreme. Seemed far too drastic. But he knew something about Asta that even Asta themselves didn’t. Because soon, he had come for Asta. With his frightening violence, he forced Asta’s husband to annul their marriage since it hadn’t even been a year, and instead bound them to him. In a single day, Asta had lost a spouse and gained another. A far more frightening one. And with Asta now by his side, Bovaird had what he needed to make that seaside town his.

With Asta as his bargaining chip, Bovaird struck a deal with the governor. He could conduct his drug business in the town in peace, as long as the governor could spend time with Asta. That was the beginning of the nightmare. From then on, Asta only wore the finest silks, the biggest pearls, the sweetest perfume, the best oils. Asta became a product. One that their legal husband could sell to highest bidder. Their worst nightmare had come true. The very thing that they had tried so hard to run from since they were a child. And it had come in the wake of such happiness.

That was what their life became. And to protect themselves from any mental attack that Bovaird could launch (and he launched many) Asta shut down everything. Their hopes, their expectations, their feelings. It was the only way to survive, lest the despair overcome them and drive them to commit reckless acts. After endless fights and wars against their husband, Asta came to accept their fate. It was not a graceful acceptance by any means. They still spat venom and cursed him, but after many failed attempts at liberation, it became safer to accept. Safer for them, and safer for everyone around them.

That was how three years passed until Erasyl’s return. He had expected a joyous reunion in which he and Asta could talk endlessly about how those years passed for each of them, but what he came back to was simply miserable. For the next few months, he worked with his people to untangle the web that Bovaird spun across the town, all to set Asta free. And he succeeded. But it felt like he hasn’t. Those years had changed Astarte. Made them soulless, like a marionette that sat and waited for whatever fate had in store for it. It was heartbreaking.

And that is how those three years passed. It’s why whenever you see Asta nowadays they seem so empty and uncharacteristically passive. They have seen and endured more than anyone ever should so they’re a little emotionally messed up right now, but there is a road to recovery, and they’ll embark on that journey when they go to Erasyl’s Viscounty and meet the other characters who’ll help them recover those frozen emotions. Haha! Anyway thank you for reading that wall of text. I didn’t really wanna talk about this infamous 3 year gap because it’s really quite heavy but.. well, it happened and I needed to give context to anything that will happen in regards to Asta from now on 🙏🏾