A Gamer's Guide 371

I grab the child box and exchange it with the god of hope box, switching their places. And then I look at Lett. Hmm. It isn’t very obvious, but… Yeah. I can tell that it’s working. The love and trust I have for him is increasing, growing stronger with every moment I spend in his proximity. 

Silently, I switch the boxes back. This… could be dangerous. On the other hand… It could also be very useful. 

I mean, frankly… Isn’t it only right that the god of hope should have an aura? 

I poke the designate emotion boxes quick enough to not start dragging them around.

<List of available substitutions for

usable emotions as per Your

current rulings and influences:

[Hope]

[Faith]

[Love]>

…Hm. Sure, I could probably add all three, but… No, wait, my rulings and influences? Okay, yeah, I can remember seeing influences as one of the things in my new stat box, but I have no idea what they are or what they do. 

System? Is there an explanation for this? System…?

{::w::}?

Ah, not even Simon knows. Gotcha. Somehow, I’m not surprised that this system is designed entirely without tutorials. Then again, I could probably ask the next god I meet what all of this means? That’d probably work out, I think. 

For now, though, let’s just add all three, because why not? And, while I’m at it, is there anything else I can change…? I poke the designate soul button, specifically the one that currently reads child. 

<[child] rulership currently

borrowed from [Goddess of Children],

aspect of [God of Multitudes.]

Replacing it will return borrowed rulership.

Proceed?>

Huh. Um… Sure? Considering the wording, it should be fine. If there’s nothing to replace it with, I’ll still have the borrowed ruling, and if there is something to replace it with… That’s better, isn’t it? Yeah, probably.

…Let’s proceed.

<List of available substitutions for

usable souls as per Your

current rulings and followers:

[Followers of Hope]>

…Good enough! Certainly better than children specifically, which usually makes me feel like a predator. I press the surely empty designation for followers of hope and thereby renounce all rights to the emotions of children. Wonderful. Another win for hope.

And, while I’m at it, I might as well check if the activation can be altered, since, you know… Gosh. I love messing around with this thing. I have no idea what effect any of this is going to have, but it’s fun and I haven’t had fun like this in such a long time. It’s like putting together a min-maxxing strat, but without the hassle of grinding! Love it.

<List of available substitutions for

usable modes of activation as per Your

current rulings and divinity:

[Within Sphere of Reign]

[Atop Holy Land of Hope]>

Hm. My sphere of reign is less than two meters and I have no holy land aside from GameStop.

…Sounds like the perfect modes of activation! 

I add both. 

And now, with almost every individual part of this skill altered, I finally feel done. Simon, would you please close down the skill editor? I am finished with my uselessification. 

{::w::}/!

<Error!

Miracle name no longer congruent 

with Miracle effects. 

Rename Lesser Miracle?>

Hm? Oh, it got ship of Theseus’d? Hmm, well, in that case…

Not thinking too hard about it, I type in a new name. 

<Lesser Miracle [Innocent Adoration]

successfully renamed to

[Evil Emotion Editor X3,000]>

Ahh, there we go. Much better! Frankly, if anyone were stupid enough to become my follower and also get within 1,7 meters of me, they deserve to get blasted with love-and-obey-me rays. This is fact.

Now, with my Evil Emotion Editor X3,000 completed, how should I edit the all-tongue skill…? 

Humming to myself, I pull up the skill editor, and get to editing. Since I’ve only done this once before, it takes a lot of trial and error, but after only an hour or so—during which the sun has begun rising properly—I have myself a radically altered skill! Well, it isn’t that different, but by adding a new line of code, I’m pretty sure I’ve changed it so that anyone within my sphere of reign is automatically able to speak to and understand everyone else within the sphere. This, of course, would not have been possible if the skill definition hadn’t already had a soul designated as [any sapient capable of hearing and/or speaking], which is pretty much everyone.

Unfortunately, I have no idea if this actually worked, since Lett is currently asleep and I have no intention on waking him.

<A choice I must agree with.

When do we ought to land?>

Great question. I’m thinking sometime around twelve… Would you know when that is?

<Yes.>

Excellent. In that case, once it’s about twelve-o-clock, try to spot a town or city and land some distance away. We wouldn’t want to make them think we’re coming to attack, after all.

<If you will permit me an admission,

I do believe that hunting down

an animal to feed Lett would 

demand less effort.>

Sure, but… Wouldn’t that be boring? We’re going on an adventure! Visiting cities and taking in the country is only to be expected. Not to mention that Lett is a growing boy. He’ll need more than meat to thrive.

<Very well. It shall be done.>

Nice. The current time is…

<Top—Status—Community>

<08:10:33

Day 1 429>

<The forty-eighth attempt will begin in

11:15:49:27>

…Eight in the morning. And, if my calculations are correct, it should be the first of December. But, of course, in Purgatory months, it would actually be the fifty-eleventh of Fart. It’s important to keep proper respect when it comes to these things.

<I believe it is the twentieth

of Yesterdays.>

Of course you’d know that. 

Or, that is… I mean, listen, Garath. It’s been a thousand years since you were hanging around. Isn’t it possible that the calendar has changed since then? Or maybe the calendar you’re using is from a culture that no longer exists?

<Impossible. For what 

reason could the months

of the year be altered?>

Plenty. Why, back in my world, there was this one guy who added his own name to the calendar, scootching it back so that the months that used to mean the tenth and such are now misplaced! And that was only… Well, okay, I don’t know how long ago that was, but recent enough for us to know.

Far below, I hear his throat hum thoughtfully.

<Perhaps. Though, I must admit

that such a change would be most

upsetting to learn.>

I can imagine. Hopefully, the calendar is still the same, and we have nothing to worry about. Either way, we have a couple of hours to waste, and I have a feeling I might know exactly how to do that. 

After all, unlike the last time I went and fiddled with the skill editor, now I can actually do something with it, aside from just wondering about the possibilities! Heheh, oh, this is going to be wonderful…!