mycrookedvice

They're definitely not talking about his nose

.... and what's worse. He's not even particularly fond of the color.

Sandbags AND Windbags

"Oh won'tcha look at that, this gym has both..." Syndra growled. Her rumbling was luckily quieted by the detective's rambling, and she quickly allowed her lips to curl--silencing it completely as she watched him prattle on about "Leftpaw's" legacy.

He certainly seemed to know what he was ta...

Unselfish

Flair's always been something of a good sport when playing stupid games. He's the Reigning Winner of stupid prizes 24 years running, so even when you lose (which you will), he's usually willing to offer a consolation gift.

Especially if he likes you <3

Ripped Up Roses

Found a neat trend on Twitter and figured I'd give it a spin.

Amelia in a bikini and jeans is a lovely look I think, and it gave me a reason to finalize the design for her Supa Sweet Shooter.

If she hits you with that arrow, jeans won't be the only thing ripped up. <3

69ing for the Sexually Adventurous

Chrysante and Vance are typically pretty on top of their physical fitness. While Vance prefers resistance training to Chrys's cardio, neither are against the idea of putting in a little extra effort for a good time. Chrysante's arms could use a bit of a workout, anyway.

"Let's see if we ca...

Consider it Done

Apparently, the tricky devil Khalid can be forgiving, with the right motivation, of course.

A special thank you to @WhiteStar0910 for sponsoring this commission!

Lillies for Iris

Past the point of fear and worry, Sakura's excited by the idea of being a new mom. Meticulously squirreling supplies away, there's less and less time to tend the gardens--both her own, and the one belonging to the A-Life. Her flowers and food are withering, leaving little for the ravenous chao to...

2024 Pin-Up: March

Introducing Chrysante, Looking good, feeling better

Michi's Madness

A special thank you to @ViewtifulJewVfx for sponsoring this commission! Enjoy the timelapse of the latter half of this commission-- you'll find it in the attachments.

See more of Michi, Nobu, and the rest of their characters 2024-03-28 16:24:20 +0000 UTC View Post

2024 Pin-Up: February

Introducing Sakura, baring it au naturale

The Whistler

Introducing Carter the Hedgehog, the Casey of Noir-Mobius:

Carter is a young man, about 18-19 and an aspiring train conductor. He's full of energy, full of life, and always looking to lend a hand, so after he discovered the Ghost Train' Express's ties to a run down soup kitchen on Pu...

Piper the Zebra

A special thank you to @WindstarOsprey for sponsoring this commission!

See more of Piper and the rest of their characters here

Let Him Eat Cake

"Imagine..."

"It's your wedding... or at least you're pretending it is for the mission. You're all dressed up, trying be the perfect bride while the room is distracted from whatever the hell you were told to distract them from."

"...and then he shows up. With that stupid fu...

Commission Call: March 2024

Wow, that's gotta be a new record. About 4 minutes in and every slot has already been claimed!

Alleycats are certainly a ravenous bunch! If anything changes, I'll send out a new notification with the number of available slots.

Thank you all for the interest in my artwork. You guys mak...

Commission Call! March 2024

Commission slots are officially open for Resident Alleycats!

Because we've surpassed 25 paid members, I will be accepting 6 commission requests.

First come first served. Please send a DM here, on Twitter, or to my discord "bloodoseverity" to claim your slot A...

Twice Tagged

A special thank you to @sksvtn for sponsoring this commission!

See more of Citrine and the rest of his characters here

*Mace Vermillion belongs to me ♡

2024 Pin-Up: January

Introducing Amelia, the Devil's food.... cake

Twiggy's Feb 2024 Doodledump

Commissions have been coming along well, but my queue's dwindling down. Here's what I've been working on in the meantine!

Looking forward to finishing a lot of pieces up when all my sponsored pieces are done <3

Rose Tinted

6 o’ clock and it was already starting to get dark.

As she stood just beyond Central Park's bronzed arches, Amelia Rosabel patiently waited for her date to appear from beyond the horizon. So far, she'd been waiting at the entrance gate for about 12 minutes. 30 minutes past the time she dr...

Halfway There

“Been a while since I had a reason to dress up for Valentine's Day. What's your excuse?”

Chrysante figured the idle conversation might help pass the time. The Crystal Club's occupancy was finally waning, and he'd not expected the place to be so full today of all days… even if he had b...

Punctuality

The silence in the room made everything a little louder than usual.

Vance wasn’t a talker, but Chrys could pick up the hushed panting of his partner very well. Alongside the shuffling of sheets, the low grunting of quiet exertion, and the squeaking of his own satisfaction, Chrys honed in ...

All Aboard the Bullet Train

Casey's on his way to a new adventure, straight outta Rail Canyon.

Special thanks to @RailroadMillion for sponsoring this commission!

Commissions Are Full

Morning all!

All commission slots have been claimed.  Any reservations made will probably be honored because I'm a big softy and I hate saying no when you guys have waited so long, hahah.

Anyway, thank you all for reaching out. Cant wait to get started!

I Showed You My Batter

It was a quarter past three when Amelia felt the soft buzzing of a cell phone against her thigh. She waited a moment before retrieving the sparkly, sequin-covered device from her jacket pocket– needing to ensure her fingers were free of dough or confectionery before laying a hand on it. She’d...

Mike's Hard Lemonade

Cheeks looked over her shoulder, aiming her eyes for a cautious glance back at her self-proclaimed chaperone. She was sure Mike was strong enough to protect her should anything go awry, so she couldn’t imagine why Chrysante had insisted on tagging along for something as common as catching up. 2023-12-11 22:01:07 +0000 UTC View Post

Panty Raid

"Man, it's kinda creepy in here. How long's she been gone anyway?"

Sabre sat on the velvet sheets of the bed rumoured to be Ms. Sexton's. As comfy as it was, it did very little to quell his nerves and he shook like an autumn leaf watching his companion rifle through the vixen's belongings....

Noxus Family Tree

A family known for their love of theatrics, and the sweet subtle notes of a wellness bouquet. 

Twiggy's November 2023 Doodledump

Been a while since I showed off some doodles. That 24-character picture took a little bit out of me, but I've got a lot of scribbles to play with in my spare time!

Happy Patreon-niversary!!

Can you guess what I'm most thankful for?

It's you guys <333
Thank you all for supporting my silly little hobby. I look forward to getting to know you and all of your characters into the next year. It was lovely doodling them all! If there wasn't enough room for you, next time I'll b...

Dinner and Dessert

She should have been used to the cold by now.

The ambient chill in the air was ever-present, and had been since Shanx first invited her up here. Yet even after three years, this place still raised her skin and stung her most sensitive places… just like he did.

Dezra felt herself s...